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What Are You…?

By Doug Nielsen

I had just finished speaking to a wonderful financial group in Columbus , Ohio. When I got on the elevator, I noticed a boy, roughly 10 years old, sitting in a heap in the corner. He wore a deeply defeated look on his face. Clearly he was not in a good spot. I asked him, “How’s it going?” He said, “I just lost in the state wide wrestling tournament.” “Oh, bummer,” I said. “There’s always next time, huh?” “No”, he said, “I lost that one too.”

Being the eternal optimist I replied, “You know if you did your best you can walk off the matt holding your head high. Did you do your best?” “No,” he said adamantly, “I lost.” He slowly moved his head straining to look me in the eye and asked, “What are you--some kind of motivational speaker or something?”

I was speechless. How had he pegged me so easily? Feeling a little embarrassed and not knowing quite what to say, I was relieved when the elevator opened on my floor providing me an easy escape. I simply turned to the little wrestler, said, “Hang in there!” and left.

As I reflected on this event, two important ideas emerged which I hope you will find of value in your life today:

1. Nothing good comes from being afraid or ashamed of being who you are. (After all, I am a motivational speaker and I feel fulfillment from trying to make the world a better place.)

2. Second, like the little wrestler, it is unhealthy to become depressed for failing to meet our often unrealistic expectations. The aftermath of such thinking leads us into two negative camps:

a) stress and anger; or

b) apathy and fear.

Neither of these unhealthy thinking patterns helps us rise to the greatness within.

Think of your most recent challenge or failure--whether big or small. After the event, what was the automatic thought that you had? What did you feel? Were your thoughts and feelings encouraging or full of embarrassment? Did you mentally lift yourself up or beat yourself to a pulp?

Feel the power of these words—“The greatest discovery of my generation is that man can alter his life simply by altering his attitude of mind.” -- William James

This months Helm Challenge is simple:

1. Choose to live with love and courage while letting go of fear. Mother Teresa said, “It’s not how much you do that matters, it’s how much love you put into the doing.” I don’t care what you are doing right now--I challenge you to make sure you are doing it with love.
   
2. I challenge you to become aware of and examine your automatic thoughts--thoughts that happen almost without effort. If these thoughts are negative or destructive, replace them with healthy and positive thoughts that will empower you to turn challenge into opportunity.

Until next time, God bless, take the Helm and brighten someone’s day!

Smooth sailing--even in the storms!